When Kids Leave for College: Supporting Their Mental Health—and Yours

It’s that time of year, when the nights get cooler and kids head off to college. Whether it’s your first child leaving home or your last, sending a child off to college stirs up a mix of excitement, pride, anxiety, and grief. It’s a time of big transitions—not just for students, but for parents too. Mental health is at the center of it all.

1. College Transition: A Mental Health Milestone

Starting college is one of the biggest emotional shifts in a young person’s life. According to recent studies, more than 60% of college students report experiencing overwhelming anxiety, and nearly half report feeling so depressed they struggle to function. It’s not just "nerves"—it’s an opportunity for early support and long-term resilience.

2. Warning Signs to Watch For

As a parent or caregiver, it’s crucial to remain gently observant. Warning signs of mental health struggles include:

• Withdrawal from social connection (even with you)

• Changes in sleep or appetite

• Academic decline or disengagement

• Expressions of hopelessness or overwhelm

• Increased substance use

Stay connected—texts, calls, or video chats can be lifelines. Ask open-ended questions and normalize talking about mental health without judgment or fixing.

3. Setting Up Mental Health Support Before They Go

Before the semester starts, help your teen prepare:

• Research on-campus counseling centers and their availability

• Make a list of local therapists and walk-in clinics near campus

• Ensure they know how to refill prescriptions or access medical care

• Talk through mental health consent laws (especially important for over-18s)

• Discuss healthy coping skills like mindfulness, exercise, peer support, and asking for help

Normalize therapy as a tool, not a crisis response. It’s just as vital as having a class schedule or dorm key.

4. Your Mental Health Matters Too

This isn’t just a transition for them—it’s for you. Parents often feel:

• Grief and loss (even if you’re proud)

• Anxiety about their safety, choices, and wellbeing

• A shifting sense of identity, especially if parenting was a central role

Give yourself permission to feel it all. Stay connected to your own support system. Talk to friends, journal, seek therapy if needed. Remember: letting go is not the same as abandoning—it’s trusting that the roots you gave them are strong enough to grow on their own.

5. Final Thoughts: Letting Go with Love

Sending a child off to college is a beautiful paradox—full of joy, fear, pride, and uncertainty. The best gift you can give them is your steady presence, even from afar, and the confidence that they can care for themselves—and ask for help when they can’t.

Support their mental health by modeling care for your own. This new chapter isn’t the end of parenting; it’s just a different kind of closeness.